“Making friends” almost sounds juvenile, it is what your parents say to you when you move school ‘it’s okay darling, you’ll make new friends!’ It is not something you usually have to consciously think about and work at when you are an adult.
“Making friends” as an adult feels like the dating game. You meet someone, have a good time, you might tentatively ask for their number and then you stew on it for a while thinking ‘should I call? What if they don’t like me? Will they think I’m weird asking them out for coffee?’ Also like dating, you have to “go out” with them two or three times before you realise whether there is something there. And sometimes you feel like that annoying girl, who keeps trying to do something and the effort is not reciprocated. That’s when you need someone to say ‘she’s just not that into you’ so you can move onto the next prospective friendship.
Of course, it doesn’t help that the Danes are notoriously difficult to crack. They’re infamously known to be “friendly, but not welcoming” – meaning their superficial interactions are pleasant, but deeper relationships are very difficult to cultivate.
I’ve done the dating game and I hate it. I dislike it even more that I have to so obviously seek friends as an adult. Oh well, at least I’ve got six of the most wonderful friends anyone could ask for at the end of the phone line.
A shout out to my beautiful friends. I miss you!